Dadda knows

I'm not always like this

I have seen highs,

When the Great I am took my hands

And whispered love songs in my ears.

His presence alive in me

Cheered the world I stepped in.

The Mighty one bending down I saw

To place on my forehead a loving kiss

But, I'm not always like this.

I sometimes hit the lows,

Question myself

If what my heart once felt was real

Though smiling and dancing

In the house of God

My own heart alone knew

The strong web of despair

Spun around my thoughts

Caught in a battle of truth and whims

I'm not always like this.

I sometimes stumble

Though I make up my mind to run the race.

Run... so I can win.

When the going seems good

Off-guard I'm caught in sin

In shame I cover my face

Disgraced by self-created mess

But I'm not always like this.

When I close my tired eyes

He still watches me.

He gives me my daily bread

He still numbers my every hair.

Even when I feel like giving up on myself

And cry like a wounded child,

He holds me tight in His loving arms and says

"Stay still... Stay right here...

My plans never go amiss

You'll not always be like this".

Dear Jesus

My prayer to You dear Lord,
Is not that You approve of my plans.
Not that You grant my desire.
Not that my dreams be realised
And my hopes be answered.

I have not come to You dear Lord,
To plead for Your attention.
Not come to cry or complain
About my failings and weaknesses.
For You see me as I am.

Dear Lord I come to You,
with a single mind.
This I expect,
This I demand...
That You have Your own way
That You have Your own way in me...

Fall

Life's not been the same always
I walk, I fall, rise and fall.
Sometimes disappointed with myself
At other times condoning my sins.
After all, I'm just human...
My failings are many, but I try
Try not to fall...
And I hope someday to rise
Rise above my weaknesses
To walk steadily in obedience.
Still I fall...
Did I not try hard enough?
Was not my faith enough?
How much longer...
Before God gives up on me?
Life's not been the same always
I walk, I fall, rise and fall.
But He loves me still the same.
Now my heart earnestly cries
Dear Lord, everyday let me fall
Fall and never rise
Fall each day with a passion anew
Evermore deeply in love with You...